RELATIONSHIPS

Love me/sext me/say what you want about me...uuuh, no!

Sexting: The act of sending sexually explicit messages or photos electronically, primarily between cell phones. According to The Center for Parent/Youth Understanding, the majority of revealing images are being sent from females to males. For girls, the recipient is often a boyfriend. In some cases it may even be an ex-boyfriend, as an act of getting him jealous. If sent to a boyfriend, the female most likely wants to keep him interested, as in: “Maybe if I send this he’ll want to be with me more.” But, some teens wonder, is it really worth it?

Smucker Almonord, 15, from the John D. O’Bryant School of Math & Science, says that when he started to sext, “One thing led to another, and we started talking about her breasts and my privates -- but I don’t consider myself a man-whore.”

Locally, the number of sexting incidents was not readily available. But nationwide, the promiscuous practice is out of control. Thirty-nine percent of teens interviewed said they sent or posted sexually suggestive messages, according to a recent survey by The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, and CosmoGirl.com.

Girls view celebrities such as Vanessa Hudgens and Miley Cyrus as role models -- and they had racy pictures surface worldwide. Just because you see a so-called star doing it doesn’t mean you have to, teens say. “A guy would only like you for sexual reasons,” says Almonord.

On the 2009 season premiere of the show “Degrassi” on TeenNick, Alli sent naked photos to her boyfriend Johnny hoping that it would make their relationship more public. But it backfired when, out of anger, he sent those messages to one of his friends. As a result, Alli’s reputation was ruined.

In the real world, the consequences can be more serious. In one case, in September, a 13-year-old Florida girl sent a topless picture of herself to a boy she liked. The image got into the wrong hands. Schoolmates called her a slut. The teen ended up hanging herself in her bedroom.

Joe Kidd, New Media and 21st Century Learning Skills Coordinator for Boston Public Schools, says that when explicit information is found on a phone, “It should immediately be turned in to the administrator if confiscated in school.”

Some girls may think that you could keep a guy in the relationship if you do dirty things -- such as sexting and maybe even physical sex when you’re not ready, just to either please him or to build a wall to block your insecurity.

Taylor Martin, 15, from the O’Bryant, says: “It’s really stupid, because obviously the person you’re sending it to isn’t going to keep it to themselves. If a guy really loves and wants to be with you he wouldn’t ask you to take racy pictures. He’ll want to be with you for who you are inside. It’s not just a photo or a video of yourself; it’s a basic disrespect of your body.”

Jaquan Wallace 15, from Boston Community Leadership Academy, agrees. “Sexting is not a good way for teens to communicate to one another,” he says. “I would never do it.”

No one can protect your body but yourself. According to law enforcement authorities, it is illegal to force anybody under 18 to pose in a nude photograph for sexual gratification. So, stand up: DON’T PRESS SEND.

Sextual beings Be smart: Think before you send pictures, knowing that nothing is private in cell phones or cyberspace. These photos can wind up in the hands of potential employers or college admissions officers. Be strong: Don’t do anything you’re not comfortable with, like sending a naked photo. Be responsible: Never ask someone to send nude photos to you, and never forward nude photos to others. --- Cheila Martinez Sources: BPS and eSchool News

SeXXXting marks the spot •Thirty-three percent of young people have been involved with sexting naked images. •Girls are more likely than guys to share a nude image of themselves, 13 percent to 9 percent. •Sixty-one percent of those who have sexted a nude photo or video of themselves say they were pressured to do so at least once. •Twenty-nine percent of those who have sexted naked images of themselves sent them to people they knew only online, and had never met. --- Cheila Martinez Source: September 2009 Associated Press/MTV study

Illicit sext For teenagers in Massachusetts, sexting can lead to serious criminal charges that include: •Possession of child pornography. •Posing a minor in a state of nudity. •Distribution of harmful matter to a minor. -- Cheila Martinez Source: Berkshire District Attorney’s Office

photo by Vicki Chin // Artists for Humanity